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Better or Worse


MAY. 2006

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"T H E  P A S T  I S  H I S T O R Y

T H E  F U T U R E  I S  
A  M Y S T E R Y

T H I S  MO M E N T  I S  A  G I F T

T H A T  I S  W H Y  I T
I S  C A L L E D  T H E  P R E S E N T

E N J O Y  I T ."
Allan Johnson




 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 












 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 







 

This is the eleventh episode in a series about Maximilian, a boy with magical thinking abilities and his friends. The series will end in June with the episode twelve.
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“We are never going to split up,” Willow said dreamily. “I want us to spend our future together.”

Maximilian looked up at her in surprise. That thought had not occurred to him. He was just enjoying having Willow as his girl friend. He really liked her.

Willow looked closely at him and waited quietly.

She is waiting for me to say that I want the same thing, Maximilian thought. He suddenly felt very nervous, being totally unprepared for the comment she had made.

“Well, uh, uh, I, I guess I do too,” Maximilian finally managed to stammer. He knew instantly he had said the wrong thing.

“You guess you do,” Willow said in a hurt voice as her eyes widened and watered.

“I, I never really thought about it before,” Maximilian mumbled.

“You have never thought about spending the future together,” Willow said, now starting to cry.

“Well, uh, uh, I, I think it did cross my mind,” Maximilian said, trying to make things better with Willow.

“You think it crossed your mind,” Willow said, wiping the tears off her cheeks and starting to get angry.

Maximilian could feel sweat in his armpits and his face getting very warm. Willow had never been mad at him. He could hardly believe it was happening. It was like a bad dream.

Instead of making things better with Willow, he had made them worse. Actually, much worse.

“We are only 15 years old,” Maximilian whined, trying to reason with her. It seemed like the grown-up thing to say.

That should work with Willow, he thought hopefully.

“All the more reason. Being only 15 years old is an opportunity to start young because we have our whole future in front of us,” Willow replied.

That was more grown-up than what I said, Maximilian thought, with a sinking feeling. He knew he was being outscored. He felt like a loser. Like the basketball team before he had helped them start winning games.

“Don’t you ever think about the future?” Willow asked, now sounding a little like his mother when she scolded him for not studying.

“My parents want me to become a famous brain surgeon,” Maximilian replied quickly, glad for that reminder about his future.

And then he paused and beamed, “But I plan to become a famous short basketball player.”

Surely that will satisfy Willow, he thought. He relaxed and waited for her warm smile.

“What does that have to do with me?” Willow cried. “Do you expect me to be your cheerleader?”

And then she raised her voice louder than he had ever heard it. “I think about our future all of the time. I thought you could see what I was thinking. That is the way it is when people really like each other.”

“If you do not want to spend your future with me, than I do not want to spend another moment with you,” Willow said and then she turned abruptly and walked away.

Maximilian was stunned. He could only stand and watch as Willow disappeared down the hall and around a corner.

Where she ran right into Suzy and Horse, almost tripping and falling on them.

They saw her angry, tear stained face.

“Oh, you had your first fight with Maximilian,” Suzy said excitedly. “That is soooo romantic.”

“Maximilian has never thought about us spending our future together,” Willow cried. “He would if he really liked me.”

“I want to spend my future with Suzanne,” Horse said quickly, just to be on the safe side with Suzy.

And it is something the new Horace would say, he thought, with a feeling of smugness that maybe he was becoming a better person than Maximilian.

“She is going to be the mother of my children,” Horse added for a little extra safety.

Suzy’s mouth dropped open and she stared at Horse. She was not prepared for what he had said.

Horse could see instantly that she had never thought about spending her future with him.

Suzy was just happy having Horse as her boy friend, especially in helping him become the new Horace. She had not totally forgotten that Horse had been her social studies project before he got contact lenses and stopped eating nuts.

“Oh, that is soooo romantic,” Willow said to Horse, wiping new tears from her cheeks.

Suzy turned to Willow. “We are only 15 years old,” she cried. “The future is too far away to think about.”

“The future is tomorrow,” Horse said, feeling wise beyond his 15 years, as the new Horace.

“So I promise to spend tomorrow with you as long as it does not involve being a mother,” Suzy replied smartly.

“But Maria, what about the children,” Horse said jokingly, thinking that things had become too serious. He was still enjoying his role as Captain Von Trapp in the production of The Sound of Music in Miss Wish’s class.

Maximilian could hear their voices. He suddenly felt very left out and alone. His friends were with Willow and she was angry with him.

He did not know what to do. I could use my magical thinking to help myself make things better with Willow, he thought.

I could easily make her say she is sorry, he thought, feeling hurt and momentarily revengeful.

No, he argued. I have to learn how to make things better when I have made them worse with Willow. I have something to learn, like Miss Wish. It made her younger. Maybe it will make me older, more grown-up, like Willow.

He glanced around the corner, but was too afraid and embarrassed to join them. Willow did not want to spend another moment with him, she said. Suzy and Horse know that he had made things worse with Willow. If they knew, everyone would soon know.

Horse saw him. Maximilian could not hide.

“I plan to spend my future with Suzy,” Horse said smugly to Maximilian.

He wanted Maximilian to know that he, the new Horace, was becoming a better person than Maximilian.

He had quickly reconsidered saying that Suzy would be the mother of his children.

“As long as the future is tomorrow,” Suzy reminded him quickly.

Willow said nothing. That is what Maximilian heard.

He knew there was something for him to learn. He decided to be brave.

“I, I would, would like to, to talk with, with Willow,” Maximilian stammered. Now that those words were finally out he had no idea what to say next.

The words “I need a moment to talk about our future,” suddenly formed in his head, like magic, and came out his mouth clearly and confidently.

Suzy smiled and sighed. She remembered how Maria and Captain Von Trapp had had a parting and came back together to be in love.

It made her want to sing a duet with Horse.

Horse’s smugness at becoming a better person than Maximilian was starting to slip.

Willow turned to look at Maximilian, crossing her arms, waiting.

He felt more nervous than when Willow waited for him to tell her he really liked her.

“I want to make things better, not worse with you,” Maximilian said.

Willow waited.

“I do want to spend the future with you,” he continued.

Willow nodded and waited.

Maximilian was starting to feel panic, seeing that what he said was not enough to make things better.

Suddenly the words came out, “The best thing about the future is that it comes one day at a time.”

He decided not mention that Abraham Lincoln had already said that a long time ago. He wanted to sound grown-up like Willow.

“The future is tomorrow,” the new Horace declared wisely, once again.

Willow smiled and came to give Maximilian a hug. “Yes, the future is always tomorrow.”

“And let us who will enjoy the future not waste any of the present,” she added.

I know a few quotes too, she thought mischievously, including that one by Abraham Lincoln.

And Suzy could no longer contain herself. She burst into song, “Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love ya tomorrow.”

She was already preparing for her role in the musical Annie that was up next in Miss Wish’s music class.

Horse beamed. It was just as good as “Oh, Danny Boy, I love you so.”

Maximilian sighed with immense relief. He had learned how to make things better with Willow after making them worse.



© C O P Y R I G H T   2 0 0 6.  Gary Holdgrafer ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

 
       * My next essay will be posted here in June.


 
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