"Matthew do you remember how to set the table? The fork goes on the left and the knife and spoon go on the right. The knife always goes between the fork and spoon with the blade facing the fork. That way if the fork attacks the spoon the knife will be ready to defend it." Those were my words coming out of my son David's mouth.

"That is exactly what I used to say to you!" I said.

It  seems that children remember and attach stories or phrases to important adults in their lives. For instance, my mother used to recite proverbs regularly and then add, "It's an old Sullivan saying." I actually believed this to be true. Now, even though I know that my family did not actually coin phrases like, "A stitch in time saves nine," in my mind I always add that it is an old Sullivan saying and I think of my mother.

Recently I received a Facebook note from my granddaughter Sullivan suggesting that I write an essay about two phrases that I have said frequently to her and her sister Josie. Both girls agree that I say little else to them. The first phrase is, "Three more bites." The second is, "People who are bored are usually boring." Let me examine each one.

Three More Bites
You can imagine that the three more bites phrase developed in the presence of picky eaters. When the girls were little they frequently wanted to be finished eating long before their food was gone. I always asked them to take three more bites before they left the table. My intention was to encourage them to eat a bit more without forcing them to clean their plates.

I did this with my own kids too. The only time it backfired was when I asked  David to eat liver. On that day I entered into a power struggle with him. I was determined that he would at least taste the liver before he said he didn't like it. Of course he knew full well that he hated liver and he was not prepared to eat it.  
          
After that experience I vowed never to force a child to eat something he really doesn't like. Nevertheless, I continue to believe that taking a few more bites is often a good thing. I should point out that Josie and Sullivan are fine eaters now as is Uncle David though he still doesn't eat liver.                                                                                                                                                                                              
People Who Are Bored Are Boring
Occasionally the girls tell me they are bored. Usually they follow immediately with, "I know, people who are bored are boring." In fact, I don't think they are often bored nor are they boring. They certainly have many interests and they  are resourceful. I notice that Josie carries her sketchbook with her wherever she goes. Sullivan excels at doing  major school projects well in advance of the due date. She has been working on her Science Fair project for weeks.

I do worry about them being so attached to their electronic equipment that they couldn't function without it. Yet I know they draw, read, play games and talk, dance and shop without the assistance of their computers, iPods and cell phones.

It pleases me that my children and grandchildren use my words even if it is sometimes in a teasing way. There are important memories attached to those words. I hope they are as precious to them as they are to me.